Reaching my Witzend!

[Musikaldave]

This probably isn't the place to vent frustration but this frustration is about the mistake I feel I made with buying this camper. Since I bought it, it has been one thing after another with repairs and expenses and working on it etc...then there's the time constraints of an overbearing wife who won't give me the availability of time to do the work and save us money on the repairs while at the same time complains that I'm spending too much to do the repairs myself but wants to go camping blah blah blah.

Being somewhat uneducated in auto mechanics it's been frustrating having to learn new skills and follow schematics and drawings and do the amount of work I've already done on this thing. I just spent the last four days; (minutes here and minutes there that are allowed by my wife) inspecting the brakes for safety and inspection concerns. At first I was going to replace the entire brake assembly, but then I thought about my wife and how much emotional and mental abuse I'd have to go through to do that, even though that would be the quickest way to get the job done, so I changed my mind and decided to let her penny pinching win the race and I settled for the old brakes being repaired to the best of my ability.

I bought some break cleaner tonight and started cleaning the parts up. I found the adjuster spring I needed at the RV dealer. The original one had snapped so it needed replaced. Once I got to the drum and hub assembly and started cleaning it and the bearings, I found out that I now have to get a seal and race for each wheel, knock all the old stuff out etc...etc..repack the bearings and set the new race and seal in place...and the drums still need turned to get a cleaner surface on them because they're rusted on the inside and the shoes won't grab right.

So now I'm facing another challenge; if I take the drums in to have them reworked; turned, and the bearings repacked, I have to listen to my wife complain about the money I spent, and if I order the parts myself online and repack the bearings and take the drums in to get them turned, I still have to listen to my wife complain that I spent more money.

It's a catch 22. Today we were at the RV dealer, and I was admiring all the new Rv's in the lot. She tells me to "Be happy with what you have!" So I think to myself, how can I be happy with what I have when you won't let me fix what I have so that it's safe for the family to have and to enjoy?

I'm very frustrated and at my witzend. Camping season is almost over and I haven't even got the wheels or lights finished on this thing, much less the brakes and the paneling I need to complete inside. I feel like it's all been a big waste of time.

Sorry for sharing, but I needed to get it out somewhere.

God speed.

 

[Sunline Fan]

I understand your frustration, Dave. In my case, my parents have been my constraint. I'm very blessed to be on my fifth Sunline, but the first four took varying amounts of work to restore. They've all required money to bring back, most if not all of which I've recouped when selling them, but they have taken a lot of time and hard work. This is mostly why I have the trailer I do now, because I bought it new (or rather 'unmolested') so it wouldn't require any repairs.

Now I'm faced with someone who wants me to buy their trailer and it's a trailer I would very much like to have and it doesn't cost much at all, but without a job right now, I can't just drive to Rochester, NY and pick it up. Hopefully they can hold onto it for a little while longer because it would make an outstanding mobile Sunline Museum.

You do deserve a lot of credit for the work you've done! I think what your wife needs most is to just get out and camp to realize how great it is and how necessary the repairs are. I'm very glad you're going through and making sure you have good working brakes though, because with an Escape for a tow vehicle, you don't have much extra braking capacity to help stop you if you didn't have trailer brakes.

I do think your trailer was much above average in terms of condition. I see a lot out there that are just beat and need a lot of help. But just because yours is better than most doesn't mean it doesn't need anything...

 

[justatourist]

Dave, It might be best to slow down on repairing the camper, take a small vacation with the family and let you both recuperate from life's bumps and bangs. You can spend money less often on the camper so she isn't so worried about that. You will be able to take more time learning the new skills needed to fix the camper. It is all about priorities. First comes the family, then money, then the camper.

Is there anything about the camper the wife might like to do? Maybe if she were more involved with it would give her more pleasure that watching something sit around soaking up money and your time. Both of which are her responsibility.

The repairs of the camper have priorities. Fix safety equipment such as lights, brakes. the mechanical stuff. Then the cosmetic as time and money allow. As for the brakes, do they really need to be turned? Is there enuff drum left to turn? Will sanding the inside do the job for less money and time?

Lastly, good luck keeping your wife happy. That will require a lot more werk than the camper.


Good Luck!

 

[poppyandnana]

Dave.....slooow down, repair what is necessary and then go camping! Life is too short to be stressed about the camper.

 

[j2cool]

Is there anything about the camper the wife might like to do? Maybe if she were more involved with it would give her more pleasure that watching something sit around soaking up money and your time. Both of which are her responsibility.

The repairs of the camper have priorities. Fix safety equipment such as lights, brakes. the mechanical stuff. Then the cosmetic as time and money allow. As for the brakes, do they really need to be turned? Is there enuff drum left to turn? Will sanding the inside do the job for less money and time?


Good Luck!

I agree with with this 100%. If there is a way to get her involved, even if its asking her opinion on how she thinks the interior color, design or something she can help do. You too will bond as you do it, she will be involved and prioritizing, backing off a little and taking a break shows that you are being mindful of her feeling while still getting work done. Past yourself, put family first, money second and stress last. Camping is about having fun; working on the camper should be fun or something to be proud of too. It shouldn't give you grief or come between you and your wife, okay.

You should be given recognition for what've you done and don't feel bad about venting. Venting is a good thing. People need to do it. Letting out steam is far better than loosing your temper or worse. That what make the forum great; sharing. You may not be the only one who is going through this but the first to say so and hear the advice and just knowing you are not alone or someone else being able to relate and also find answers in the ones given to you is the good thing. I like to commend you for being able to talk about it that in itself is not alway easy for people.

It will get better.

 

[Musikaldave]

Thank you all for the support and recommendations!

I'll admit; I sometimes get my priorities out of line and the comment about putting family first, then money then the camper was dead on.

I also am going to get the wife more involved with the project as I see I've been isolating and making it all "mine". I guess I tend to get that way whenever there's tinkering, tools, dirt and grease involved... I don't mean too, it just happens.

Hanging in there!

 

[justatourist]

Dave, No big deal. It is a guy thing. One that men and women do equally well. We do need to step back from time to time and double check relationships. Good luck with getting the wife involved. Try something with less grease.

 

[EMD_Driver]

I don't have the "Nagging" wife to have to deal with, but Kitty tends to try reigning me in sometimes. When it comes to the camper, she's either all for it, or says "Do we really need that?"

I have to say, that with her being sick, I really miss her help with things. She used to always be out there with me, helping as best she could. She still tries sometimes, but just doesn't have the energy.


Having your wife helping you, would be a great idea. She could even get some "Getting dirty" clothes to wear! She would also learn with you!