Humor..!

[Janalee]

Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock. The brunette balances their checkbook, then takes their last $600 dollars out west to another ranch where a man has a prize bull for sale. Upon leaving, she tells her sister, "When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home."

The brunette arrives at the man's ranch, inspects the bull, and decides she does want to buy it. The man tells her that he can sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news. She walks into the telegraph office, and says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home." The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, "It's just 99 cents a word."

With just $1 left, she realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word. After thinking for a few minutes, she nods, and says, "I want you to send her the word, 'comfortable.'" The telegraph operator shakes his head. " How will she know what you mean, if you only send her the word, 'comfortable'?"

The brunette explains, "My sister's blonde, she'll read it very slowly."

[bunjin]

LOL! That was good!

[bunjin]

It's funny....just yesterday afternoon we here at work were just talking and musing able the old "prince Albert in a can" joke, jerky boys, play on words and some funny scenes in movies and today I'm walking around telling this joke!

[Janalee]

Happy to give you a laugh! The blondes here won't get it...lol!

[Gene]

LOL ..... but I had to read the punchline real sloooooowly

[Janalee]

Originally Posted by Gene

LOL ..... but I had to read the punchline real sloooooowly

Okay...now let's take a poll here and see how smart our readers/members really are! C'mon--be honest folks! Did YOU get the punchline??

[mainah]

Yes, I have several blond nieces and get to hear all the blond jokes. Why was the blond hanging here head out the car window? She was refueling.

[bunjin]

I got it....and that is no ble!

[Janalee]

Well I'll admit I maybe did not get mainah' s !! Hmmmmm...maybe "airhead" ? Refuel? Got to be it!

[mainah]

Originally Posted by Janalee

Well I'll admit I maybe did not get mainah' s !! Hmmmmm...maybe "airhead" ? Refuel? Got to be it!

Yep air head.

[Janalee]

Cute one mainah! I will use that on my grand daughters!!

[Poppy & Nana]

An Irish daughter had not been home for over 5 years. Upon her return, her
Father cursed her heavily.

'Where have ye been all this time, child? Why did ye not write to us, not even a
line? Why didn't ye call? Can ye not understand what ye put yer old Mother
thru?'

The girl, crying, replied, 'Sniff, sniff... Dad... I became a prostitute.'

'Ye what!? Get out a here, ye shameless harlot! Sinner! You're a disgrace to
this Catholic family.'

'OK, Dad.. As ye wish. I only came back to give mum this luxurious fur coat,
title deed to a ten bedroom mansion, plus a £5 million savings certificate. For
me little brother, this gold Rolex. And for ye Daddy, the sparkling new Me rcedes
limited edition convertible that's parked outside plus a membership to the
country club ... (takes a breath) ... And an invitation for ye all to spend New
Year's Eve on board my new yacht in the Riviera ..'

'What was it ye said ye had become?' says Dad.

Girl, crying again, 'A prostitute, Daddy! Sniff, sniff.'

'Oh! My Goodness! Ye scared me half to death, girl!
I thought ye said a Protestant!
Come here and give yer old Dad a hug!

[Tourist]

They're both good!

[Wannabes]

Janalee,

One brunette with tinsel and one follicle-y challenged in this house and we both got the joke!

[Janalee]

Hey Lisa and Matt! Love that tinsel description!! Lol! Merry Christmas and have many fun adventures in "our" 2363 !! Anytime you need a 'searcher' just let me know!!

[Janalee]

Getting a Divorce

An elderly man in Oklahoma calls his son in New York and says, "I hate to ruin your day son, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are getting a divorce; 45 years of marriage and that much misery is enough!"

"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son yells.

"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the old dad explained. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Hong Kong and tell her!".

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts, "I'll take care of this." She calls her elderly father immediately, and screams at him, "You are not getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, you hear me?" she yelled as she hung up the phone.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay", he says, "it's all set. They're both coming for Christmas and paying their own air-fare.

[Wannabes]

Janalee,

That's two times you put a smile on our face… well, three if you want to count finding our 2363! We'll let you know if we need you to search for us again, altho' we're so happy with our 2363 I don't foresee that happening soon. We've been keeping our eye out in these parts for a Toyota Dolphin-style camper that you'd like. Merry Christmas to you and your husband!

[Gene]

The real reason the reindeer didn't like Rudolph was that he got to see the world in a single night and all they got to see was Rudolph's butt.

[mainah]

Yeah if your not the lead reindeer the scenery never changes.

[awellis3]

Similar to the joke my bartender tells.
Q: What's the difference between a bartender and a stage coach driver?
A: The driver only sees six A-holes a day.

Happy New Year,
Teach